Contents
Issue No.1
Issue No.2
Issue No.3



Issue No.1
DarKSicKnEsSx
Well, LiGhTSicKneSs-x was failing some incredible shit on Message Boards, but I decided to go to his little butt-buddy. He started a 2 vs. 1 game for whatever reason against me and his teammate quit at the loading screen. Clearly this person wasn't quite as pathetic as DarKSicKnEsSx. Anyway, I was fucking around so I picked short range guns like the Shot Defender. Do note that on Combat Ops this gun is not only short range but does not have the ability to blast people like regular shotguns. Anyway, from the instant he saw me using it he started to run away. This was his first act of cowardice. After this he began hiding behind everything for long periods of time and his attacks were one shot at a time when I wasn't shooting or when I was reloading. He was also lagging. This is because it took four shots with the AR-15 I picked up from him (yes, he was using the long range two to four hit killing gun) and he killed me in two hits. This happened for every kill from both myself and him. In the end I won with a score of seven to his four. He was talking shit after and said "join or ur a biitch" like most idiots do. I then said "mk if u a bich" and basically killed him with his own logic. He decides once again to fail with this logic by saying "if u dnt join it provs nuttin but how much of a qweer u r". I replied, "if u mk ur a bich" and "if i dnt join im better". It may seem like a childish response, but it was using his own logic against him. Seriously, when you use shitty logic like that it's just bound to fail. He called me a "nerd" and I called him a "geek". Yes, it's so easy to make a point when there's no supporting details involved. After losing the game and the argument, DarKSicKnEsSx earns his spot as the second SFCO Failure. BONUS: After reading this issue, DeathStarch asked DarKSicKnEsSx online if he really lost to me. Of course his reply was "XD no.." and then "i was messin round". He later added "y shud i try" and continues to contradict the fact that he did indeed lose. Here's the excuse after the story!

Issue No.2
Mr-TickleMeNutts
I was going about my business as usual and, of course, the second I go to chat some fag wants to act hard against the best. He said, and I quote while reading, "ew its F^ggot asz Ruff..." I of course said "glad 2 see ppl still obsessed w/mi" because he obviously is if he can't help but cry out my name every time I'm online. Since making sense is so lame, he responded "Glad to see ur still a bch n always will b..." because it's obvious that I'm the bitch because he started shit. He also claims that "wen i put u dwn... its not Obsessing u f^gget.." because there's no way you can be obsessed with someone if you only talk about them 24/7 and call them out because you're so in love with seeing them. He later confesses that I'm cool by saying "Hes saying that ***** to mk him look cool..." because, of course, my haters are so jealous of my awesomeness. Oh and while I was typing this message and not responding to him online, he typed all of this (to himself, I assume):
"i wana see his lil emo asz in RL.." - Pedophile much?
"xDDD" - Laughing at yourself much?
"id fuhk him up infront of his daddy to see" - Self humiliation much?
"His daddy dont Love him..." - Wannabe stalker much?
"Hes a Horrible fuhkin NoLife ****** whom suhks **** 4 enough" - Yeah, it takes a life to keep talking about someone when they aren't even responding!
"money to feed him self" - Logic is overrated.
"Cz his mom is 2 buisy Dancing on poles infront of mi...n his dad" - Can't want to see the rest.
"dont love him" - I should have guessed... repeating yourself is win!

Issue No.3
decepticon555
Transformers... when I was eight, that cartoon didn't seem gay. Here's some messages from a 40 year old who stills likes it. I was just in US-West, as usual, and an obsessed stalker decided to come leave homosexual comments out of gay lust, as usual. Here they are, for you to decide how gay he is.
decepticon555: o: (gay faces always make a good introduction)
decepticon555: ****** (this happens with my haters a lot)
decepticon555: !!! (words aren't cool enough for him)
decepticon555: Hi YOU H0M0 (overuse - where would they be without it?)
decepticon555: : D (gay faces - they don't stop)
decepticon555: U STUPiD FUHKiNG EMO LONER (spaz out because you're cool)
decepticon555: >: D (gay faces - wasn't lying)
decepticon555: UR MOM WAS ON MY **** BiCHY KiD (if spaz fails, try again)
decepticon555: >: D (thinking of new stuff - why bother?)
But don't think he didn't have a reason! He saw his lover Mr-TickleMeNutts (I'm assuming it's a guy but don't leave out the possibility it's both) in need of assistance-when fighting me- WorldKing lol they lost ;).